Facing Your Fears

Are you confident? Are you safe and secure? Are you accomplished, savvy, on top of your game and in charge of your life? How do you measure your own worth? Does life seem hell-bent on curbing your enthusiasm, or do specific life situations periodically trip you up, making you feel momentarily less than? And if (more appropriately, when) that happens, what can you do about it?

Millions of women across the globe grapple with their status in the current status quo, and are looking for ways to bring about lasting change for themselves, their families, and for the planet. There are no hard and fast rules for change that work for every culture — a woman’s road is nuanced with personal challenges based at least in part on the cultural soup she is born into. That said, however, there is one commonality for us all. No matter where you live, or what your starting position is, the first step to moving forward with positive change is knowing that you’re worth the effort. The next step is facing your fears.

Since I thrust myself into the public eye to promote my new book, What is Your Self Worth, A Woman’s Guide to Validation, I’ve experienced plenty of fears — perceived boundaries, worries about my ability, and feelings of intimidation.

Overcoming fear is one of life’s biggest challenges, and as all of you know, it’s a recurrent theme. Fear, whether it is fear of failure, fear of abandonment, fear of ridicule, or fear of criticism, is the pernicious gatekeeper that attempts to block your progress in efforts to reach your full potential.

I came face to face with one of my fears while taping the Larry King show — the fear of using my voice, of public speaking. I was so intimidated by the surroundings that I felt I had lost all my brain cells at once. Though others may not have noticed my deer-in-the-headlights moment, I felt it like a postmenopausal hot flash. Fortunately, I got a grip during the first part of the interview, and had a very strong internal conversation with myself to get my ‘mojo’ back.

Life pitches all of us curve balls — we need to accept that. However, life also gives us some formidable internal resources to deal with them. Realize that you may miss a few swings, but don’t give up. Stand up to your fear. Turn your courage on, and instead of being terrified of defeat, be determined to learn how to hit those curve balls out of the park the next time.